the ten commandments

This was originally given to me years ago when I owned a cat. That was before he left home and went to live with a neighbour. Winston, a friend’s cat, I am sure will agree with every word. I’ve always liked it so I thought I would share it with you.

A cat owner’s ten commandments

  1. Thou shalt not feed me the same food twice.
  2. Thou shalt not tell me what to do  – EVER.
  3. Thou shalt not sit on my chair without my permission (nor wilt thou even think of making the bed just because thou hast finished lying in it!)
  4. Never wilt thou complain if I sharpen my claws on the cabriole legs of thine antique Chippendale’s.
  5. Thou shalt remember that I need to be let out at 2am and back in at 5am, nor shalt thou object to my nocturnal singing, fighting or colleagues in the yard. 
  6. Thou shalt, on winter days, remember that the space in front of the fire is reserved unto me alone, not shalt thou grumble about muddy footprints on thy car’s bonnet!
  7. Thou shalt not buy a dog – at least not one with teeth and legs.
  8. Thou shalt never put a lid on the goldfish bowl, rev the car when I am under it, nor feed the birds until I have positioned myself in the garden!
  9. Remember, when thou shufflest unto thy refrigerator at night, that I shall be verily underfoot, nor canst thou open it, however silently, without me knowing.
  10. Thou shalt study all the above and keep to them faithfully all thy days, or truly I shalt leave fur on thy best suit and piddle in places thou didst not even know thou hadst. 
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One Response to the ten commandments

  1. Leigh says:

    Gee – don’t tell Ted (my cat) about this!

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